New Start, Restart

I thought that this blog would be left to wither away in cyberspace (and I would be left to wither away in America), but life is full of surprises and unexpected returns.

I thought about starting a new blog, a new page with a new name, but I think it will be even more useful to me to connect all of my experiences together. Just as my professor prophesied when I left Europe two years ago, Geneva became another world barely remembered, another life of experiences lived by a person who was not me. The months after, when I went to live in New York City, a place I never in my life thought I could or would live, the lessons I learned there also seemed to be left behind when I returned to college. Even though I had solid ground on who I was and what I wanted from all these experiences, which didn't include applying to graduate school for choral conducting, I decided in spirit of the old American Dream, to go for it anyway. I wanted to prove to myself that I could hold on to a childhood dream, even though maybe I hadn't prepared for it in the way I had planned to. I faced a lot of psychological turmoil in my last year at Smith, which also created pieces of me that are hard to put together with the others and integrate into my next steps towards being a person in the real world. For now, my American Dream is on hold. More updates to follow.

It's a really hard time to be a recent college graduate in America. All of my close friends are carrying a lot of weight on their shoulders and in their psyches. We're all not really sure where to go, what to do, how to be relevant, how to move on, how to feel independent in a economy that often requires we rely on others until we are able to get back on our feet. We're not sure what our dreams are anymore. But we still support each other, and we're still able to make steps forward, however small they are and difficult they are to take.

I leave September 20th to go to Europe, the place that helped me figure it all out the last time. On the 29th, I'll move to France, where I will teach English conversation to middle and high school students (I'll work at one lycée and one collège). I'm looking forward to teaching, since it has always been my passion, and I hope that my love and study of music will come in handy and allow students to connect with me and my culture, and I with theirs.

My nerves are fully fired, but my determination is slow burning and never runs out.

Follow my blog to keep up to date with my experiences, and for me to keep up with yours!